HOW?

How do i catch you up on the last several months. Too much has happened. Probably the biggest thing was as of Sept 3 I became officially divorced. Freedom! Josh never responded to divorce papers of anytime so the divorce went into default and I got everything I asked for. Right around that same time I ran into an old friend and after hanging out a few times we started dating, it got serious pretty fast, probably too fast and we decided yesterday to slow down and actually try to "start over" whatever that means, howerver you do that? He started taking the missionary discussions last month and has decided to be baptized on Dec 6. I am so proud of him, he is going to have some resistance from family and friends but he already has a good testimony, so i know he will be fine. I'm having mixed feelings about "starting over" for real....what does that mean...?
well since it's close to thanksgiving i decided to post things that i'm thankful for:
today i'm especially thankful for friends, my job, my sweet girls, my health, my home. what are you thankful for?

what!?!?

so i was bloghopping and found this little bit of lovliness and thought i should share it with you.




just a note to anybody thinking about getting a fake i.d.
no matter how much you love your girl you should leave her out of the i.d photo

your welcome

Maddy the Hairdresser

BEFORE:





AFTER:


Her schedule is pretty booked but if you need a half mullet i'm sure we could work you in.

minute with maddy

i just wanted to share a little conversation i had with maddy yesterday.

let me preface it be telling you that we went to robin's saturday for swimming and dinner and the kids played with each other for a few hours.

maddy: mom i have a boyfrind
me: excuse me
maddy: yeah tucker said i'm his boyfriend
me: tucker said you're his girlfriend
maddy: yes and he even kissed me
me: he kissed you? where?
maddy: just right here on the arm

help

could someone please tutor me on how not to have an ugly blog?

kimber's recital

Kimber had a recital on tuesday of this week. it was so cute and so fun and she did a wonderful job. Here's a few pictures from before the recital.




Here's some during the recital.





Here's a few from after!





I am so proud of her and what a beautiful girl she is turning into. She has such a sweet spirit and is a wonderful helper.

May 31st

Saturday was such a beautiful day. It was more amazing than i could have even imagined. i got to the Temple bright and early at 7:30. i had a few minutes to sit outside and soak it all in before my mom met me there. we went in and it was amazing. i just wanted to look around and take everything in. i didn't see a few people come in that i was expecting to be there and was kind of disappointed, but i had to remind myself that that wasn't why i was there and soon i was concentrating on other things anyways. there were a couple of moments for me that i had a hard time with. i was sitting by a girl getting her endowments because she's getting married next week and i suddenly found myself really sad. i guess i am just starting to get a little bit lonely. there was another part later on when certain promises were made that i just got so overwhelmed by, that i was literally sobbing, i haven't cried like that in a long time. when i got to the part where i could be with my family and friends it felt so good, and someone that i was hoping would be there and hadn't seen come in was actually there and really made my day nearly perfect. anyways it was obviously very beautiful and i am so glad that i made the decision to go. it was a little weird because it seemed like such an unattainable goal for so long and now i've done it, of course with a lot of help from other people some of whom didn't even know they were helping me.

ps: also of importance i filed my divorce papers may 22nd, and i got a phone call from josh today saying he was picking them up. he has 30 days from today to respond. i will keep you updated on how things go. please keep us in your prayers that things will go well, that whatever is best for the girls will happen, and that if it isn't what i want or think is best i will be able to accept and understand it.

my big news

so i don't know if anyone is still around reading this but i have some exciting news. i am going through the temple on may 31st! i know right?! did you think i would ever make it? thank you to all of my friends who were/are such good examples to me. i love you!!

???

do you believe in love at first sight

where have i been?

busy busy busy, that's where. this whole raisin' babies alone thing is HARD work! Let me give you a little bit of insight into my life. I get up at 5:30 get myself ready for work, then I get the girls ready ususally with a lot of fighting, kicking and screaming. If I'm lucky we get out the door by 7:15, then it's off to my mom's to drop Kimber off so she can get to school but doesn't have to be there so early, after that it's off to the sitter's to drop off Maddy and Ellie. Most mornings Ellie starts crying as soon as we round the corner to go to the sitter's and I have to try to keep my cool and not lose it with her. After i drop them off it's off to work usually i get there without a second to spare and in fact most days i'm late. So, I start work at 8 and go until 5 then i go pick everyone up, go home start dinner, get the girls showered and ready for bed then we all collapse in bed. You'll notice no where in there did I say I get any cleaning done, oh no thats what saturdays are for. So please dont ever stop by my house un-announced because I wont let you in. I've been really struggling lately with everything. I still haven't filed for divorce, it's such a big decision and once its done its so final. I get so angry sometimes with Josh that i have to deal with dropping kids off at daycare and having my mom take Kimber to school and never being able to volunteer in her class, or probably never get to go on a field trip with her. I am the one that has to deal with the cryinng and the owies and the fighting all the while trying to keep my own stuff together enough to be a good mom. All he has to do is send some money every two weeks and he thinks hes a wonderful father. Sorry i probably shouldn't be sharing this with anyone but it's been so long since I posted that i doubt if anyone is reading this anyways. On a lighter note Ellie is starting to say some words and actually this morning said "uh-oh" for the first time. That happens to be one of my favorite baby phrases. here are some pictures of the girls I had taken in December. Enjoy